I have received word that tomorrow’s newspaper will out me as the true identity of the superhero Bubble-Beard.

In order to lessen the shock to you, one of my dearest friends, I am announcing the same. I felt it would be better if you heard it from me directly, so when people call you tomorrow asking if you can get them into the fabled Temple of Bubble, wherein lies the source of my powers – the golden chinstrap.

For the record, my whisker-y fortress is off-limits to the general public. Although clumsy mortals such as your soon-to-be-dissappointed friends are covered by my liability insurance, the last time someone got sucked into the turbines on the BubbleJet® (a miniature of which is soon to be packaged with a limited edition of my action figure by the company which brought you the bubble-blowing Godzilla toy) my premium shot through the roof!

So, anyways. Sorry I didn’t tell you before. I just wanted to keep you safe from the evil mastermind, Bälde Shäverstein. Twitter if you run into any of henchmen. Bye

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P.S. This is a great time to tell you about a few great & super-heroic sites that you should love & digest with frequency:

• http://344design.typepad.com/ is the home of the Daily Monster. Fast-forwarded videos of unique, hand drawn monsters.
• http://www.thesuperest.com/ Ridiculous super heroes out-doing each other: Who is the Superest of them all? Start with the first hero.
• http://superuseless.blogspot.com/ details incredibly useless super-powers. I love love love “13th Bullet-Proof”:

1. Bang!
2. Bang!
3. Bang!
4. Bang!
5. Bang!
6. Bang!
7. Bang!
8. Bang!
9. Bang!
10. Bang!
11. Bang!
12. Bang!
13. Boink

Tags: beard, graphics, self portrait, superhero

This entry was posted on Friday, January 23rd, 2009 at 9:58 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.